Once again we woke up to a glorious morning on Friday. Marianne slept inside again, but this time I slept in the tent. It was wonderful! The night was so quiet and peaceful. You could hear fish jumping and splashing in the harbour, and in the background, the ever-present mourning doves. Before getting up and preparing for the day, I languished in the tent for awhile, quietly remembering all the fun that was had the night before.
 
I had planned to take Marianne around to some places today, so we got on the road early. First we drove down to the wharf in Goldboro. My BFF Cheryl used to live directly across the street from the wharf, and we spent many days together on that pier. We used to climb down over the side to this little hollowed out area in the boulders, and just sit together for hours. Then Marianne and I drove out this old road that used to lead to the goldmines. There are a lot of houses out that way now, but the road is too bad to get all the way back to the mines, so we turned around and took a drive out to the natural gas plant in Goldboro. That was an interesting sight. It looks like an alien landscape out there, with all the pipes and steam and burn off flame. They say that sometimes at night when it flares up, you can see it quite far away. There were men assembling pipeline, and trucks hauling gravel. It looked like the plant was employing all the young men for miles around.

Anyway we left there, and took a drive down to Drum Head. We drove around the cove where the lobster boats unload their catch. It is a very picturesque place, and when we got there, a boat was just arriving, and there were cars parked and waiting to buy the best lobster around. I heard it was 4 dollars a pound! I don't know why we didn't buy any.   After leaving here, we decided to head back to Heather's. As we were driving to Drum Head Marianne noticed something on the side of the road, so on our way back we had to stop and take a picture of this oddity. This phone booth  was on the side of the road. It is the only payphone that I now of located in Goldboro/Isaac's Harbour, and it still works. You cannot find a working payphone in the city if your life depended on it, yet here was this one in the middle of nowhere. We found it very odd!

When we got back to Heather's cottage, we decided to take a walk up to the old swimming hole - The Falls! A group from the other side of the harbour left earlier and we met them at the bridge over the Isaac's Harbour River. Me, Heather, Darlene, Cookie and Marianne met up with Nickie, Cara, Megan, Summer, Daniel, Shawna.      After we gathered our breath, we decided to take the old path to The Falls and not the old road on the other side. As children we used to run that path wide open about 4 times a day. As we made our way I remembered every root and rock, and  every bend in the path and swampy part. I wasn't sure if Marianne was going to make it though. What seemed like a little jaunt to a child, was now a laboured trek to us 40 somethings.
 


About halfway there, I tried to take some pictures at a spot that used to have a power station and power house. I had  found this postcard picture on line some months ago, and the caption said that it was Isaac's Harbour, N.S. After some inquiries on Facebook, someone said that it was the old power house. Anyway I wanted to try and get a before and after. This is what I got....

Before!    After!   

I thought it was a pretty cool thing. I look at the old picture and I wonder what it must have been like living there in a community rich from gold. It must have been a wonderfully prosperous time rich with opportunity.

So, after much sweating and strain, we made it to the part of The Falls where we used to swim as kids. The water was very high and still quite cold, but a couple of brave people went in. Cara, Megan and Summer were the courageous ones in the crowd. I debated going in, but in the end chickened out. Not having swim trunks might have had something to do with my decision. Just sitting there taking in the sound of the water, the smell of the fresh air moved by the rushing water was contentment enough. Every rock brought back memories! It was the first time I had been to The Falls in years. Like I said before, we children used to swim at this spot every summer. Sometimes we would make the trek several times a day. We never tired of it. We would have fires, bring food, and bath in these waters. We would fish, make out, break up, have diving competitions, and fight with horseflies bigger than eyeballs. They were wonderful times, and this place will always hold a very special place in my heart. I have told my family that when I pass on from this world, I would like my ashes sprinkled at this spot.
 

After our little adventure at The Falls we headed back to Heather's place, and then Marianne and I made another beer run. The beer store down home is located at the small gas station in Country Harbour, which is about a 15 minutes drive away from Goldboro. It is very weird to go to the store to buy bread, get gas and buy beer all at the same time, but hey, it works, and the owner is probably making a killing. 

When we pulled into the driveway of the cottage my BFF, Cheryl and her brother Jamie were sitting on the patio with Heather and Jamie. Cheryl was suppose to get a drive down with my sisters, Marney and Crystal, but they weren't sure if they were going, so Cheryl got a drive with her brother Jamie. I was so happy to see her there. Cheryl and I have been friends since we were 9 years old, and she is one of my true constance in this world. I love her to death and am not sure where I'd be without her support and love.

So after getting her set up and settled in,   I got ready to make an appearance over at Dan Mason's parents anniversary party at the fire hall. I arrived there and within minutes started to have a panic attack. I said hello to a few people that I knew, but left very quickly because I there were so many people there that I didn't remember. It was great seeing Alma, Maxine, Donna, Jean and Linda. They are sister that live at the harbour that were very kind and caring to me when I was growing up. They hadn't changed in all the years that have passed, and they are still gems in my heart. I will love them forever for what they did for me. I also saw my Uncle Johnny and Aunt Lorna. As I was leaving I saw my Aunt Florence and took a couple of pictures of her. 
 
 Aunt Florence.

When I arrived back at the cottage, people started to arrive in earnest. The first people to show up were Heather's family. Again, I hadn't seen them for years and years. Heather's mother, Juanita, hadn't aged at all. She was always a beautiful woman. So kind and gentle! Heather's oldest sister, Paula, looked like a movie star. She brought her oldest son - a real good looking lad, with a gentle disposition. The whole family is good looking. Heather's brother, Kevin brought his lovely wife and their children. In tow was Heather's little baby sister, Krista. The last time I saw Krista was when she was like 3 or 4. Krista too is a gentle soul with a big heart. It was fantastic seeing them all. The only person in the family who couldn't make it was Bruce, Heather's big brother. He had to work unloading a shrimp boat. My sister's Marney and Crystal also surprised us by showing up. Here is a picture of The Shaw family that were in attendance (minus the children).  

The rest of the afternoon kind of went by in a blur of faces, laughter, hugging, and partying. Below is a collage of pictures showing people who attended the party.

 This is Kevin's wife, Karen. This is Miranda, my sister, Crystal, Nickie and Melissa.

 My cousin Janice.   Alma, Linda, Donna, Jean, Regina, and Maxine.  My BFF, Cheryl and Dan Mason. Dan was the musical guest and he was joined by Cheryl for a couple of songs.

 A veranda full of people.  A yard full fo people.   Dan Mason. You can find him here http://www.danmasoncountry.com/ 

 Roberta.  Donna and Elizabeth.

 Cindy.  Nickie.  My sister Marney, Lana and my sister Crystal. 

Well as the sun was setting it was getting harder and harder to take pictures. There are lots of people that I didn't get a good picture of, but trust me when I say, that a good time was had by all. I spent a great deal of time mingling and keeping on top of the clean up. The thrill of the evening was when Dan and his back up players took to the stage. Dan grew up down home, and was always the first to get picked to sing at our school concerts. He had the voice of an angel when we were children, and it came as no surprise that he followed his dreams of becoming a professional singer.songwriter. He sings traditional country music, and writes most of his own material. When he took the stage everyone's attention was on him. He took some breaks, but not many, and when he did, his back up band played some tradtional Newfoundland music. At one point Dan asked that Cheryl join him on stage. Cheryl wasn't really prepared for it, but she was a trooper. She usually sings blues and has her own blues band in the city. They are called After Hours, and can be found on Facebook. http://www.facebook.com/?ref=home#!/group.php?gid=10150125406560274&ref=ts . Cheryl sang a couple of Johnny Cash songs, and then she and Dan sang a couple of songs. Overall, I think it's safe to say that the evening was a geat hit. 

As darkness fell upon The Gathering, people started to go home. It was a big day in the harbour, what with Mona and Jim's anniversary party and our Gathering, so people were tired. Half of Heather's family headed back to Truro. Other people who live locally headed home to their beds, and some of us partied on. At the end of the night when it was quiet around the cottage and the place was cleaned up, a bunch of us decided to go over to my cousin's and her husband's place (Joanne and Brian).

   Joanne is my cousin and Brian is her man! They are both awesome people. Joanne and her sister Shawna always stole food for me, and we used to sing big out beside their house. Joanne and Shawna's mom, Norma, was my mother's sister, Nelsie. When we were children we did everything together: swimming at The Falls, ice fishing, skating, going to school, family get-togethers, drinking, smoking, all the great childhood accomplishments. I have fond memories of these two gals.

Anyway, after The Gathering ungathered, a bunch of us found our way to Joanne and Brian's. The party seemed to be in full swing when we arrived, so we took no time polishing off a few brewskies!  Mostly what I remember is drinking lots of beer, taking lots of pictures, and trying to steal a whisk broom. April was trying to aid and abet, and partially succeeded. Unfortunately, all of our work was in vain. I lost the dam thing when I stumbled back to the cottage in a drunken state! Here are some of the pictures that I took.   This is Brian and Sandra.    This is Cara and April.  My good friend, Jamie.

 Shawna laughing her head off - as usual! 

 This is Joanne, Crystal, and Brian.    Joanne. April 
 
I also remember Marianne snagging onto a really cute guy. She pulled me aside and told me she was going for a drive with him. He seemed like a really nice guy and Marianne said she trusted him, so off they went.   While they were gone, we folks in the garage partied on for a while longer. My sister, Marney, was getting very giddy, and came close to peeing herself several times. My sister, Crystal, was tired and sun-soaked.  It had been a rough few months for her. Needless to say, they were soon off to bed. Joanne graciously gave them beds. Thank you Joanne and Brian! My sister's had been on the go since 6 am, and their trip to The Gathering, was not really planned.

It wasn't too long after they passed out, that the party started to unwind. I guess after I left, the only ones still going were April and Blake. I can't remember what time I left, but I know when I finally stumbled into Heather's yard, the birds were singing and the sun was cresting the horizon. It took me about 45 minutes to make it. Now all of you from  the harbour know, that it does not take that long to walk from Joanne's to Heather's cottage. The reason for my slow going, as you may have guessed, was due to way too many Budweiser. I fell in and climbed out of the ditch too many times to count, or remember. I weaved and woozled from one side of the road to the other and made a couple of pit stops.

The first of which was the big tree! Well, I should say, what is left of the big tree! You have to understand that this tree was the tree that all of us kids used to meet at. We spent our childhoods under, around and in this tree. It was a big old spruce that stood at least 40 feet high. It was massive, or so it seemed to us children. The first time I ever tried grass, I did so under this tree. I think I was 13 or 14. I got so high I couldn't move or walk for hours. I was with my cousin, who shall remain nameless for reason that I may embarrass her. Let's just say she is my cousin, and she is pictured above.

Well on this night of drunkeness, I wrapped my arms around what is left of the tree and I wept. I wept for my childhood gone, I wept for my spent youth, and I wept for the death of my mother. I wept for the joy I felt for being home, I wept for the beauty of all my friends and family who came to The Gathering and I wept for the joy that I felt for being alive. I said good bye to the tree then and I wove my way back to Heather's.

I stumbled into her yard when the sun was coming up and the birds were singing. I thought Marianne had  someone in the tent, so I slept fitfully in the car before moving to a lawn chair and finally the lawn itself. I laid in the gorious brillance of morning - the morning of June 13, and I wept a few more tears, thankful for the sun, the birds and the soft grass, and I slept.

Well, after a lovely sound sleep on the first night being back home at the harbour, I woke fairly early in the morning. Marianne and I slept inside the cottage because it was really too cold to sleep in the tent. We are not wimps! It really was quite cold that night. Anyway we woke to a beautiful morning. The sun was shining brilliantly, and the birds were singing. Heather's next door neighbor raises mourning doves, and the sound they make is hauntingly beautiiful. There also seemed to be a lot of crows around that morning too. After eating a bite to eat and enjoying several cups of joe, I wondered outside to the outhouse (yes I used an outhouse most of the time I was there). This was the scene that I woke up to.

      This bird house had been taken over by Starlings. Peter said there had been swallows living in it but they were evicted.

After having shaken the sleep from my head, Heather and I started planning our day. We had a bit of a list of things that needed to be done before people began arriving for The Gathering. We expected people to start dropping by this afternoon. When we planned The Gathering we expected that people would trickle in sporadically over the next 2-3 days, and we weren't wrong on this. We sat on the deck for most of the morning talking and planning and drinking a few cold ones. It was a very relaxing morning. 

When finally motivated, I organized the tent, gathered wood from the wood pile for a bonfire, and helped tidy up the cottage. I also noticed while working around the place that there was a tree that needed pruning, so I did that as well. The branches that I cut off made for great kindling for the first bonfire of the reunion. I successfully worked myself into a sweat by that time, but before having any more beer, I had to do a beer run. Before this though, my cousing Darlene asked me to drive her to the store to get something for her lunch for work. Darlene had stayed the night and still hadn't found her way home yet. I guess she was really glad to see me! 

  Before driving her to the store however, we dropped by her house to check on the animals. I will never forget what I saw when I pulled into the yard. Darlene got out of the car and two dogs came out of no where. She corralled them back into the house, but not before at least 7 cats and kittens escaped from the same door she had put the dogs through. Not only that, but out of the bushes, sheds and trees, at least 15 more kittens came bounding at the sound of Darlene's voice. She had some time getting all those felines back inside the house. After about 10 minutes she finally accomplished the task, and came to the car. When she got inside I asked her where all the cats came from. She only said that they were all going to the SPCA. I purrrrrsued the topic no further, but I will never get the image of all those cats and kittens running every which way. In the end I managed to get Darlene safely to and from the store, and I was not attacked by a rampaging pack of feral cats. I also managed to do a beer run shortly after that. 

Later that day Heather and I managed to get quite a lot done. We moved the big screened tent from one side of the yard to another. We went to an old hall over in Isaac's Harbour to collect some tables and chairs. This hall that we went to is an old Free Mason meeting hall, and it had been years since I stepped inside its walls. The last time was for a concert of sorts when I was maybe 7 or 8. The insides of the hall, the chairs, benches and the paint hadn't changed at all. The place was creepy as old hell! After we loaded a table or two and some chairs onto the truck, Heather and I went back inside to explore a bit. 

     There was a set of stairs that led to the upstairs, and when I first approached them and rounded the first bend in the stairwell, I got the most horrific feeling. It was like someone was standing on the steps waiting for me. I got chills all over my body. Heather got a good kick out of that. We laughed a bit, took some pictures, looked through some old ledgers, and tried on this goofy looking hat. As you can see from the middle picture, I took our role-playing a bit further. Back at the cottage we got the tables and chairs set up, we had some more beer, relaxed for a few hours, and then got ready for some people to arrive.

Heather's neighbors had been dropping by off and on since our arrival. One of the most memorable characters was my dear old friend Johnny. I knew Johnny when he was a young man growing up in Goldboro. He married a lovely woman named Marion, but unfortuantely she died at a very young age after having 3 beautiful children, one of which died in infancy. His other surviving children, John Vernon and Laura Lee, turned out to be lovely people. Johnny did a great job being a single dad, and he himself is quite the character. 

  This picture shows Laura Lee, John Vernon and Heather. Don't they look happy?

 In this picture are Laura Lee, Heather, David and dear old Johnny.  He got into all kinds of trouble during the weekend, which I will talk about later. 

So, like I said, as the day went on we had various visitors. It was so wonderful seeing everyone. I hadn't seen Johnny's children since they were knee high to grasshoppers. We spent the rest of the afternoon that day just sitting out on the deck soaking up the sun and fresh air. I keep talking about the fresh air because there is really nothing like the sent of salt water in clean crisp air. It really does revitalize ones soul when one is stuck in the city for so long. 

I am not one to sit still for very long, so while people milled about the cottage and deck, I puttered around the yard and took pictures. By the end of The Gathering I took 392 of them. I was thrilled to see my cousin Miranda and a dear family friend Eileen. Both of these girls looked great and it was great giving Miranda a big giant hug.   Mirand is on the left and the lady with Heather is Eileen. I grew up with Eileen's sons and daughter, and I used to babysit Miranda when she was a wee one. 

I won't get into a list of people that arrived that day cause it would just make for boring reading, so I will post a few pictures here of various folks that dropped by that afternoon. 
 My cousin Cara.  David.  Trevor.
 Frank and Heather.  Marianne and my cousin Joanne.
 My cousin Nickie.  Kaitlin.  My cousin Shawna.

The rest of the evening was a great experience. At first we got a very young crowd  who were so fun to party with. The wickedest thing about this crowd was that they were so easy going. All the young guys were heavily into country music, and a riot to hang out with. Marianne and I drank a lot of Budweisers, and she fit right in. Everyone loved her and made her feel very welcome.

As more people arrived and the night went on, I started to notice that the crowd was dividing. The younger ones were staying near the cottage on the patio, and had taken command of the stereo. Whereas the people my age and a bit younger, were hanging out near the bonfire that had been lit. The one I had gathered the wood for! Then again, there were some people who were drifting back and forth. Everyone was getting along wonderfully. My heart still races with pride when I look back on this memory. There were no cross words, no clashings of egos, no stupid drunkedness. Oh, don't get me wrong, there was plenty of drinking, but us folks from the harbour are happy drunks. Right guys? 

  Laura Lee and David.  The Boys.


Like I was saying, the young kids down home love their country music. They like Johnny Cash, George Jones, Randy Travis, all the old classics. Well, at one point in the night brave Marianne decides that she wants to put a song on. She politely and jokingly tells the boys that they have been playing their type of music all evening, and she only thinks it's fair that she get to put on a song or two. Well let me tell you, they did NOT like Lady Gaga! When Marianne put one of her songs on I thought there was going to be a riot. Peter, our host went nuts-o! He demaded that their be "no more of that crap tonight". I got him calmed down fairly quickly, we avoided a group meltdown, and the party roared on.

I spent a great deal of time sitting around the fire and tending to my baby. I have always loved bonfires! I don't know anyone who doesn't?     This was my most memorable part of Friday night. It was so cosy and comfortable and...natural! My best friend while growing up - Angie - was there, as was Shawna, my cousin, Heather, Trevor, Joanne, and quite a few others. The fire roared and the conversations and laughter came freely. We laughed till we cried! Really! Our sense of connectedness hadn't faultered in all these years. We felt close, comforted, and carefree then, and we did on this night. I was blessed  to be experiencing this weekend. It came along in good time. Being there, down home, so soon after my mom's death really helped me with the coming to terms and grief of it all. I could not have asked for anything better.

However, the night could not be complete without someone falling into the fire. And the person to do that was none other than Trevor.  We were all drinking, standing or sitting around the bonfire, which was blazing a good 4 feet high. Well, I am not sure what prompted him to do it, but he got up and jumped right in the dam flames. I kid you not folks! He leapt on top of the fire and did a little jig for about a minute. The funny thing about this is that Trevor works for the local volunteer fire department. The strange thing about the situation was that he didn't even singe any hair or clothing. When he finally decided to step out of the fire, I told him that if he does that again, I will not put him out, and that I was to drunk to do CPR. Thank goodness the harbour was a bodies toss away.

People started leaving shortly after this. First in trickles and then in droves! I sat at the bonfire well into the wee hours of morning. It was a peaceful and reflective time. I was alone with the bugs, the bonfire, the beer, and felt truly blessed to have been brought up with such amazing, caring and funny people. The stars were bright in the sky, the day had been everything a person could ask for, and I thanked God for letting me have a childhood in such a beautiful place. I am thankful for endless days of fishing, bountiful hours of berry picking, mile high blue skies that held kites, towering majestic trees climbed with monkey-like agility, a river to swim in during summers that never seemed to end, monsterous hills that were mountains to a child with a sled, moonlight nights of garden raiding, countless warm days playing baseball, and above all, I am thankful for all the people that shared it with me.

I went to sleep before my head hit the sleeping bag, and I dreamed!

Well, after having driven all the way to Country Harbour and back for my mother's burial on the 8th of June,  I now faced the challenge of preparing for a big reunion me and my cousin had been planning for months. We called this reunion, The Gathering. Its purpose was to bring together family friends who were brought up around Isaac's Harbour, Goldboro, etal. I spent my childhood as it were, running the roads of Isaac's Harbour, Nova Scotia, and have many fond memories of many fond friends. We played together, loved together, went to school together, cried together, skinned our knees together, got drunk together, and laughed together.

My friend Heather and I were talking on Facebook many months ago, and we were saying how nice it would be for all of the famly and childhood friends to see each other again. Heather was planning a trip home from out west, and she was going to stay at the old family cottage. She said that everyone could meet there, and hold the reunion on her property. I was mulling over what I was going to do for my vacation this year, so we thought we'd give it a go. We created a Facebook page and the rest is history. www.facebook.com/home.php#!/event.php 

I wanted to blog about The Gathering, but wasn't quite sure how I would go about that task, so I decided to break the event into days. I hope you enjoy the following installments.

Day 1 June 9, 2010 - I spent this day hanging out with friends, doing laundry and getting ready for the reunion. The day flew by and had nothing in it that intices me to write about it.

Day 2, June 10, 2010 - I woke up bright and early. It was a beautiful sunny day, and the morning was spent running around like a chicken with its head cut off. The first thing I did was head off to Enterprise Car Rental. The customer service rep was a gentleman and very helpful. The whole experience there was a win. I highly reccomend them if you want to rent a car with the minimum of hassle. I was in an out and behind the wheel of car within 30 minutes.

After renting the car, I decided to go pay my friends Angie and her daughter a little visit. She was shocked to see me behind the wheel of car, and even took pictures. I in turn took pictures of her, her dad and her beautiful daughter. I couldn't stay very long because I need to finish packing for my trip, and my friend Marianne - who came with me to the renunion - was meeting me at my house at 1 PM.

To make a long story short, we met, we loaded up the car, and then dropped off at her house to pick up her stuff. We were on the road shortly after 2 pm, and headed to what we dubbed The Great Adventures of Duane and Marianne. Before I finish up with this entry, just let me add that this was the first time that Marianne ever was in a car with me while I was driving. She was very nervous at first, but soon realized that I was a good driver. She later said that they only time she got nervous was when we were approaching Miller's Lake heading toward the airport. There is a big turn there, and I was going a bit too fast, so going around that turn scared the crap out of her - and me - but once we came out of that turn on all wheels, she settled in for a nice drive.

After driving for about 2 hours we ran into a sheet of pour rain, that we saw coming. The cloud burst last for about 20 minutes. Well, I hate driving in the rain, so with white knuckles, I stopped at the next Tim Hortons. Marianne went to the washroom, and I grabbed our stimulates. Once back on the highway, I ride was uneventful until we arrived in New Glasgow.

I had to stop in New Glasgow to pick up the camping gear I was borrowing from my sister, Susan. I had Marianne call her as we drove through the downtown core, thinking I knew where I was going. I have visited my sister many times, but never have I driven to her house. I was always the passenger, so never really minded where I was going before. Marianne received instructions from my sister, but having never been to New Glasgow, she had no idea what my sister just told her. I then relied on my vague recall skills.

As we approached a street that I knew was close, I figured there was really no need to panic, and I wanted very badly to hit Marianne. After several loops, turns, reversals, and sudden stops, we arrived safely at my sister's place on Hawthorn Drive. 

My sister had all the gear ready, and after laughing at me for not calling back for directions, she grab a hold of me, and gave me a wonderful hug. She did the same to Marianne. We visited for a spell, and then, due to having to drive for 2 more hours before dark. Susan saw us off with the promsise of a phone call when we arrived in Antigonish. Our plan was to stop in Antigonish, get beer, gas up again, and go shopping for provisions. That was the plan, but if you know me and Marianne, our plans never go as planned. 

When we finally arrived in the lovely little Catholic university town, we found a mall that had all the stores to meet our needs. There was a Sobey's, a  drugstore, and most inmportantly, a booze store. All 3 lined up in a row. Our first stop was the booze store. We completed our business, and the first person we run into, is none other than Marianne's brother. What are the odds of that eh? Not very good, but there he was nonetheless. Later we find out he drives a transport truck delivering flyers. So, anyway he invites us to his hotel room for a beer, which is just around the corner. He and Marianne are getting a great chuckle out of them running into one another. They play catch up at the room and have a beer. I take pictures! The reunion is short-lived, we say our good byes, and then we are off to the grocery store.

Well, I will confess here and now, that I haven't been grovery shopping for years. That is a long story, and I may mention the reasons at some later date, but I must press on. Anyway, Marianne makes a big deal of this in the grocery store. She takes pictures, and makes fun off me. Looki back now, it was pretty halarious! Here I was not knowing where anything was, and being totally amazed by all the new products, while Marianne tried to keep me on track and under budget. We got many strange looks from the store personnel and patrons, but to heck with them eh?

After a time, we managed to get most of what we needed, and no one got hurt. Marianne suggested we get a roasted chicken for our dinner. I love those things, and as it turned out, so does Marianne. We had the thing basically picked clean in about 30 minutes. With faces stuffed, hands greasy with chicken fat, and an adventurous spirits, we found our exit to head towards Sherbrooke, and hit the gas.

We arrived in Goldboro around 7:30 pm, and were warmly greeted by my cousin Heather and her partner Peter.  They generously offered to hold The Gathering 2010 at their cottage. I grew up with Heather and her family. They lived in Goldboro for many years, and we went to school together at Riverview School. They eventually moved to Truro. Many times over the span of the weekend, Heather told the story to anyone that would listen, about the night I pushed her into the fridge and she cut her hand. We were like 10 or 11 years old. I still feel really bad about that. Apparently I was a very aggressive child.

Once we settled in and had a few beer, I set up the tent before it got too dark. The tent was very easy to erect, and by the time I finished it dusk was full upon us. I grabbed my camera and took this picture of the view from my tent.  For the rest of the evening Heather. Peter, Marianne, myself and my cousin Darlene sat on the patio drinking beer, recalling memories and catching up. I hadn't seen Heather or Darlene in 27 years, so there was so much to talk about. We stayed up till the wee hours of the morning, and it was absolutely wonderful seeing them again. Heather's partner, Peter I was just meeting, and by the end of The Gathering, which lasted 4 days, I must say that he is one of the most gentle, genuine, good natured person I have ever met. Being down home on this first night, at the old homestead, with wonderful people on either side and all around me, was a feeling that I struggle to put into words. I felt young, old, at peace, sad, torn, and while I was contemplating these feelings, everyone was embracing my friend Marianne like she was family. It also didn't hurt that Marianne is a very warm and funny person, and everyone that meets her, loves her instantly. It also doesn't hurt that she has the best laugh ever. At one point we were swarmed by giant Junebugs. Well, let me tell you everyone in the harbour that night heard Marianne's laugh - and her screams.  

As the seond day of The Gathering drew to an end, I went to bed with an array of emotions coursing through my mind. I fell asleep with the fresh air blowing in through the window of the cottage and peepers outside (it was too cold to sleep in the tent on the first night), and I dreamt about days spent as a child fishing, swimming and playing baseball.          
                                                                                              

Hello everyone! I have been away and neglecting the blog lately, but I hope you will forgive me, for I have good reasons. First let me say that I am totally exhausted emotionally. Last Sunday on the 6th of June, I recieved the news that my mother passed away at 5:54 am. She was fighting  very hard to win her battle against cancer and lost. We buried her on the 8th, under a dark and unpredicatable sky in Country Harbour, Nova Scotia. Then on Thursday the 11th of June I attended a big reunion down home in Goldboro, Nova Scotia. This event was in the planning since Feburary 17th of this year, so I felt obligated to go. Now that you know the reasons for my absence, let me give you some details of this rollercoaster week that was.

Like I said, my mother Nelsie E. Kaiser-Hayne passed away on the 8th of June. She was diagnosed with lung cancer early last year. She was only 70 years old. My mother lived a hard life. She was born in Country Harbour, Nova Scotia in the year 1939. She was one of 6 children born to dirt poor parents. She married young and had 3 children, me being one of them. I have two older sisters. My mother married a man who was quite abusive, and she left him when I was only 3 years old. She left me and my sisters with her husband, thinking that he would be able to provide for us better then she thought she could. She was wrong, very wrong! I won't get into any details of my life with this man, but I will say that he was very angry that she left, and took out all his rage on me. My childhood was not a pleasant one, and again, I will not get into details here, but suffice it to say that he was abusive towards me in every way.

My mother moved to a community not far away, and had 3 more children with another man. She did not try to get her older children back, or so I thought. We older children were basically brought up by a string of babysitters. I can recall at least 4 woman who looked after us. My father was a wheelsman on the Great Lake's freighers, so he was away 6 -7 months out of the year. In the meantime our mother seemed to be making a pretty good go of it with her new family, and we older child basically brought up ourselves. Then in 1977 our father died of lung cancer. But I get ahead of myself here. I don't want to slam my mother, but she was quite the drinker and partier, and I recall times when she would follow the school bus home. I was very young and was not sure who this woman was. I was not sure of her motives. The only thing I knew as a child of 10 or 11 was that there was this witch-like woman in a truck with two strange men trying to capture me. This is one of my first recollections of my mother. When I got off the bus, she and these men would chase me through the woods. I have a few other vague memories of her when I was young. Another one was when I was maybe 12, and she came to our little 4 rooom house with gifts. I hide behind the wood stove until she left. I wasn't sure who she was. All I knew was that it was the same woman who chased me through the woods.  Our father burned or discarded the gifts she came with. I now know that they were Christmas gifts for her children. Looking back now I realize that this was her way of reaching out to us, but when you are a child in an abusive home, and a strange woman tries to contact you, the only thing you know is that you are scared and confused.  

Anyway, in 1977 our father died. He was not very old. On the day of the funeral in Isacc's Harbour, we were all gathered for the service. I was sitting with my two sisters in the front row. I remember looking around at all the faces in the crowd, and crying a lot. I think the tears were ones of sorrow and happiness. I was sad because the only parent I knew was being put into the ground, but I was also happy because the abuse would now end. I remember crying, and then being tapped on the shoulder. When I turned around my mother was there. At this time in my life I was made aware of who she was. She whispered in my ear,  "Why are you crying? He wasn't your father anyway!"  I can still hear those words like it was yesterday. I was 13 at the time, and remember being totally devastated by those words. I hated everyone at that moment in time, and still have a hard time coming to terms with the events of that day.

Life went on with me and my sisters living in our little house in The Harbour. Eventually my older sisters moved out, got boyfriends and husbands, and I lived in the little house on my own. Looking back now it is a crazy thing that I was allowed to do that. I was only 14 or 15, and living on my own in a 4 room house with no running water. I managed fine, and remember feeling very free and very liberated. I was not being told what to do. I was not being abused. I was living! I remember boxes of groceries being dropped off by the rural mail deliverer. To this day I am still not sure who was responsible for that kind act. I chopped my own wood, I cooked for myself and I continued to go to school. I hunted.  I gathered berrys and apples and rhubarb. I fished and forgaged! Life was good compared to what was. Eventually I graduated from high school, but I have to say here and now that there were a lot of people in my small community who helped me a great deal. Two of those people were dear old Elsie Sangster and Delores Walsh. When times were really bad they sheltered and feed me. Perhaps I will blog about those times at a later date. I do not want this entry to become too autobiographical, so I will move on.

I moved away to Dartmouth, Nova Scotia, and then eventually to Toronto, Ontario. I tried to forge a relationship with my mother in later years, but it just wasn't meant to be. I mourned the loss of that relationhips for many years, but evetunally decided that it was time to forgive and move on. I wanted very much to create a life of my own, under my own prowess. The Lord blessed me with intelligence and compassion, and  I realized that my gift was working with children. To this day I am still working with children, and I know that God is pleased with my choices. I have felt his guiding hand all through my life, and I regret nothing. Eventually, after living almost 20 years in Toronto, I moved back to Nova Scotia. I kept in contact with my family, and to this day, me and all my siblings are very close. The first batch and the second!

When Mom got sick we all drew closer to her, but the sicker she got the more I couldn't face seeing her disintegrate. It was aweful! The cancer in her lungs was treated with chemotherapy, and that stopped the cancer cells from growing. However, it moved into her brain. She had good days and bads days. Some days she was lucid and herself, but other days, due to the tumor pressing against her brain, she didn't know who she was, who her children were, or even where she was. The doctors tried to shrink the tumor through intense radiation, and that helped for a while, but it was very aggressive, and when it came back, it came back forcefully and with avengence. She succumbed to it on the 6th, and thus began the process of saying good bye to my mother anew. 

The private service was very bittersweet. We drove from Halifax, Nova Scotia on the 8th. The weather was beautiful until we reached Country Harbour. We all prayed that the rain would hold off, and in a way it did. At the grave site, it sprinkled a bit but didn't pour. The sky was dotted with ominous clouds, and the surrounding pine trees seem to be holding their breath. It was a surreal experience! As the service progressed I sensed a presence in the trees, like something was watching over us. This may sound strange, but I took comfort in that feeling. These spirits seemed to be giving me strength. My older sister Marney read some passages from the bible, then I read a poem that I wrote for my mother. but let me tell you now, that this poem did not come easy. It basically took me 45 years to write it in my head, but once I sat down to write it out, it came flowing and forceful.I have included that poem at the bottom of this entry. After I read this poem, my sister Crystal sang two of our mother's favorite songs, and then my brother Miles read a poem he wrote for her. Finally my sister Vicki and her son Sam, spoke a few words. Our sister Susan chose not to say anything. I think if she had of, she would have fallen apart. I respect her for that, and I like to think that Susan said her good byes to our mother while she was dying on Sunday. Overall it was a lovely service. Mom's remaining siblings were there, and that brought great comfort to everyone. As we left the cemetary I saw a Bluejay. The reason I bring that up is because the Bluejay was one of Mom's favorite birds, and when we stopped in at my sister Susan's place in New Glasgowearlier in the day, we saw one in her back yard.

After the service at the grave site, the whole group went to our Uncle John's for refreshments and rememberence, and as we drove into the driveway, another Blujay was seen. It was so wonderful talking about Mom with her brother and sisters. It was great seeing the room where Mom slept as a little girl, and it was wonderful beyond measure to spend time with the part of the family that we haven't seen in so very long. We took tons of pictures, we ate some great food, we remembered our mother, sister, grandmother and great grandmother. We played charades and we rejoiced a life. We forgave and we forgot the bad times, and we embarced the mother that she was. The good, the bad and the ugly. It was closure and I am thankful for the moments.

In closing this chapter, I would like to add that I have seen a Bluejay almost everyday since Mom's passing. Coincidence or a sign?

I will continue this story later on, and I will post some pictures from the service too. In the next part of this story I will tell you all about the big Gathering that I planned in February that took place in Goldboro/Isacc's Harbour on the weekend of the 11th, just 3 days after the funeral. It was a grand time, and I look forward to telling you all about it, so stay tuned.  

Here is the poem I wrote for my mother and read at her funeral service.

She: A Tribute to My Mother

She is daughter of man and God
She is sister and secret-keeper
She is lover of life and laughter
She is youth, vitality and beauty
She is possibility and she is free

She is strife and lonliness
She is trapped and dispirited
She is hope and a glimmer of chance
She is now mother and wife
She is scared and she is exhilarated

She is fruitful and multiplies
She is tempted and tempest
She is strong and suffering
She is entertaining yet empty
She is regretful and she is ruined

She is leaving and longing
She is free again and frightened
She is abrasive and abased
She is wanted and taken in
She is desired and she is desrious

She is reborn and yet remains
She is with child and without her children
She is careless and dangerous
She is blinded and brash
She is lost and she is loved

She is a grandmother unique
She is a fighter and survivor
She is widow and wiser
She is talented and naive
She is feeble and she is fearless

She is our mother and our muse
She is here and she is humbled
She is heaven-bound and forgiven
She is praying and she is prayed for
She is winged and she is waiting

Written By - Duane Edward Kaiser February 3, 2010

I decided this morning that I would start a blog, so here I am! I have never done anything like this before, and frankly am not all that computer suavy. What I know about computers and stuff, I have taught myself over the years. I figured I may as well be a user friendly kind of middle aged guy, since we are in the age of technology, and it's the 21st century and all. I noticed that a lot of people use www.livejournal.com, and I figured one blog provider is as good as another, so here I am at http://duanekaiser.livejournal.com/ . I may change the name later if I can, cause that one doesn't sound too exciting.

Anyway, here I am at work writing my first entry. I started working at 4 pm this afternoon, and am working until 8 am. It's a long shift, but at the end of the tunnel lies a 4-day weekend, and it's May 24 weekend at that! I have all my work done, so I thought I work at getting this blog set up.

You might ask why on earth I am working a 16-hour shift, and what I do for a living. Well, I work with special needs children. I have been working for the same organization for almost 8 years, and the kids I work with are special indeed. I work in a residential program with 3 very cool teenage boys. Today, when I came into work they were quite hyper, so my co-worker took 2 of them out to play Nerf Tag, while I tried to make homemade pizzas. I had to prepare the dough myself, which wasn't a pretty sight let me tell you. I was swearing under my breath the whole time. The dam dough wouldn't thin out or stay in a roundish shape. The dam things kept ripping, and on a few occasions I wanted to throw the stuff out the window and order take out, but I persisted, and, I might add, the pizzas turned out fine. My nerves not so fine!

Anyway, it's been a long day, and I still have 4 hours to go before the end of my shift. The kids are in bed sleeping soundly, and I still have shit to do, so I will end this entry with a wish to you all for a great May 24 weekend. Be good, have fun, play safe, and be kind to the person next to you.

Duane